Morning Mourning

Wow I am up very early this morning. I am very teary this morning. I've been thinking about my mother, who passed when I was 15. Mannn cancer is a true battle, I just thank God for her. I wonder what our relationship would be like if she was still alive. Its nothing like yo momma....tear. For so many years I thought  that seeing her battle would be one of the hardest things I had to see In my life and then in 2005 my father had a heart attack in church while he was preaching and died.......On Mothers Day!!! of all days. I sure do miss being a daddy's girl. Its a cold cold world!! You never know Gods Master plan. My God mother really Stepped up to the plate and adopted my sister and I, 3months ago sickle cell took her life.. I decided today I'm just gone cry. Lord knows I'm tired this reminds me of a poem of mine. I'm just gone post it and stop writing about my emotional inside..

Laugh My Tears Away

                                                            One day I’m going to laugh

Laugh in the face of my enemies, Spit in the face of those who said I wouldn’t make it and let them know where there place is.

One day I’m going to laugh when I look back over my life and I think about all the people who where trifling, family, friends, those who pretend but weren’t there when I thought my life would end.

One day I’m going to laugh when I look back on Love realizing all along it was just lust. One day I’m going to laugh when I think of all the places I rested my head and all those times the couch and floor where my bed.

I’m really gone laugh when I can make donations instead of the one receiving and eating imitations.

One day it’s gone be funny when I look back and think about how my mother and father are together now and they’re both in heaven looking down.

One day I will chuckle that my God mothers there now, you know I believe im still in denial.

One day im going to laugh and dry up all these tears.

I guess I just have to cry for a while and laughter comes with years